Thursday, September 20, 2012


Your responses made me cry. Thank you so much for validating how I’m feeling. My family is somewhat nearby (about an hour by car), and they do help, but emotionally they are completely unsupportive. I should be used to it. Many years ago I had a chronic migraine problem. They would go on for weeks and months without a break. At one point I even had my dr try an inpatient treatment to break the headache cycle. I saw several top neurologists who specialized in headaches. Despite going to a few appointments with me at one point and having two different neuros tell my mother that, yes, they were migraines, and likely inherited from her side of the family, since they were not like the migraines she’d had, she didn’t believe me. When I told her about the possible fibro diagnosis, she said, “I doubt you have that. People with fibromyalgia are very fatigued.” I thought my head would explode. Seriously, what part of “I’m in a lot of pain, it hurts pretty much all over, and I’m exhausted,” did you not hear? Instead I’m admonished not to talk about my “aches and pains” in front of Sunshine. I am grateful for the help I get with Sunshine, but the emotional battering that comes with it is hard to take. And makes me a little paranoid about being taken seriously.

Regarding the info in the comments, again, THANK YOU! The dr I’m seeing now is a pain specialist (as was the last one I saw for this, the one who kept me waiting so long). The current dr did send me for autoimmune blood work a couple of months ago, which was negative. I also had a very thorough autoimmune workup with a hematologist both before I started IVF, and again during the first trimester of my pregnancy. So I’m not sure if it’s really necessary to see a rheumatologist right now. I will ask my dr about mobic, since two of you have suggested it. I take a LOT of ibuprofen these days. I’ve tried ce1ebrex in the past, and didn’t find it helpful, so I’m a little skeptical of a once a day anti-inflammatory, but I’m willing to give it a shot.

I need a vacation! It’s just not in the cards right now. I read about other SMCs going on vacations with their families, or getting invites to beach houses. To say a vacation with my family would be a disaster is an understatement. And we don’t have any friends with beach houses. As a city girl and a non-driver, the prospect of traveling with my toddler on my own is hugely daunting. At the moment, finances don’t permit anyway, but I keep joking that we’ll go on vacation when Sunshine is old enough to wheel her own luggage. Only I’m not really joking. I love to travel, and can’t wait to show Sunshine lots of wonderful places. But traveling with her right now sounds more stressful than staying home. It makes me sad, but on the other hand, as an older mom, I’ve already seen a lot of the world, so I don’t feel deprived in that way. And I don’t think Sunshine will grow up feeling deprived that she didn’t travel as a toddler. She enjoys plenty of cool local events and attractions. Now that I sometimes let her get out of her stroller in the subway, a subway ride is an awesome adventure.

Again, thanks for the support. I love you all!


gwinne said...

Thinking of you. My friend A, also an SMC, deals with chronic pain as well. I know how hard her days are. HOping it gets easier.

Baby Smiling In Back Seat said...

You're always welcome to take your vacation at my house. :)

St Elsewhere said...



Shannon said...

Don't let your experience with Celebrex fool you - it's a much weaker anti-inflammatory than ibuprofen - there are some good once or twice a day ones out there, that work better than ibuprofen, IMO.

Melissia said...

I am so glad to hear that you have had a good work up and that you have a pain control specialist. Mobic works well with osteoarthritis which may be an issue if you are having back issues and may help with the fibro. Another thing that may help is an antidepressant. Not because you are depressed, but because research has shown that pain receptors can be filled by the antidepressant because they match chemically. It is a standard treatment and it does work, I can attest to it, just don't take one known for weight gain! There are many that are weight neutral and even some that are known for weight loss.
I know that you are doing everything you can to feel like yourself again.

battynurse said...

I can't really say my experience with a rheumatologist has been hugely helpful. He always wants to put me on some medicine I don't want to take. Like methotrexate. I hope you get something that works.